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When it comes to taking care of your face, most people have at least a basic regimen in place. Even legs and arms have some sort of a look in. But what about your more secret areas? I’m talking about the kind that are usually covered by underwear. Are they getting left out of the fun?

Well there are a ton of products on the market designed to beautify your boobs, butt and vagina. And here is a rundown of some of the best:


Generally speaking, any cream which makes promises about lifting is taking you for a fool. Creams can’t reach deep enough to make any sort of impact on the shape, size and structure of your breasts. Which is fine, as they are perfect the way they are – I promise.

However, what can beautify boobs is treating the delicate skin well. Boob skin is almost as delicate as our under-eyes, and we slather those in creams to prevent them wrinkling up. The Content Beauty Boobs Essential Oil is a great natural treatment to hydrate and fortify the skin. Plus, rubbing oil is a great way of keeping abreast (sorry) of any changes or lumps.

If you’re more into scientific proofs, the Mio Boob Tube is a great choice. It’s an intense anti ager packed with omegas and antioxidants. In fact, Mio are so invested in this product that they even say you can use this cream as a facial moisturiser.


One of the most common booty related complaints is that of stretch marks – even though Kendrick said they’re fine! Although the only thing that actually fades stretch marks is time, there are ways to speed up the process.

Bio Oil is a classic for a reason – and while the jury is still out on stretch mark fading, it is a fantastic, cost effective product to make boots softer, more evenly tones and give skin a glow.

For those wanted something a bit more active, I’ve been really enjoying the Face Theory Retinol Oil. It has the cell turnover enhancing properties of retinol suspended in a thick, squalene solution. This means it can fade hyper-pigmentation while still promoting skin elasticity and softness.

Another butt related issue is cellulite. Now, I’m not going to lie to you – you can’t use a cream to get rid of cellulite. In fact, there’s not much that get rid of it. Except for dry brushing. Dry brushing exfoliates the skin, stimulates blood flow and boost lymphatic drainage. It’s honestly one of the only beauty routines which delivers almost immediate and visible results. The Mio Body Brush is one of the best on the market, combining bristles with harder nodules to really get your blood pumping.


Vagina wise, I’m basically of the belief that if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. And if it is broke, you probably need to go see a doctor. However, one vagina related beauty product I love is the Fur Pubic Oil. Do I really need an entire separate product in order to keep my pubes soft? Probably not. Do I love it? Hell yes.

One other thing to mention on the vagina front is probiotics. Yes, sound the alarms, I’m talking about health. Like any beauty person talking about a more serious matter, I’m on troubled ground here, but let me just say that probiotics not only help keep everything in working order, but can have a great impact on hormonal acne issues. And with that, I’ll shut up on the matter. Oh, sorry, one more thing – RMS does some great ones.


A couple of final things I’d like to mention. If thigh chafing is a problem for you, Lush has an amazing product called Silky Underwear. It’s a creepy name, but you can dust it on your areas of concern and they’ll glide across each other with no pain or rashes. It’s also quite moisturising for the skin and smells really good, like vanilla and jasmine.

And if you’re feeling generally shitty about your body, there are two quick fixes that can help. The first is fake tanning – the whole new range called Isle of Paradise is brilliant. I particularly love their Self Tanning Water, which even a total oaf like me can’t mess up. My other “trick” is to apply some sort of shimmery product. Because you can’t polish a turd, but you can cover it in glitter, or whatever. Vita Liberata’s Capture The Light is one of the best – it gives R&B video girl circa 2004 vibes. Oh, and remember that you absolutely are hot, even if your brain isn’t co-operating with that thought process at this exact moment.

Shop our editor-approved must haves for all your beauty parts

Featured images via British Vogue / Alasdair McLellan

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