Ho-Ho-Ho The Funniest Christmas Stories Out There | The Weekly Cut

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Christmas is not only an excuse to be merry but also a time where you spend a lot (and when I say a lot, I really mean it) of time with the family. Let’s face it, we’re all independent men and women and although we absolutely love our families, things can definitely get overwhelming after a few days.

Whether it’s to reminisce about the times when you were kids and did crazy things, or discuss the latest Christmas village gossip around the chimney, there’s always something to talk about during this time of the year, which is why we’ve gathered some of the funniest ones we’ve heard from our friends, colleagues, and even random people at the pub.

Please note: all of those anecdotes are anonymous, so don’t try and guess who they came from and enjoy!

The Peeking Family

“My parents and I always seem to talk about this at Christmas time, but when we were all kids (I have 5 brothers and sisters) it became a family tradition to drive around the neighbourhood and look at all the Christmas lights, and as soon as we would get home we would sit around the living room table and vote for the best one. One year however, as lame as it all sounds (please remember we were between 2-10 years old) as we were driving around the neighbourhood we saw one of our older neighbours through her living room window, completely naked as she was decorating her tree! And let me tell you, we never went around her house again!”

The Village Goss

“This is actually really lame and I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone outside of my village before but there is this rumour in my hometown that the local baker and butcher have a secret affair and only get together on Christmas night. I have yet to find proof on whether or not this is true but I have a feeling people are only speculating because it happens to be the only day they are both closed!”

The Scary Santa

“When my third child was around 3 years old, we decided it was a good age to get my uncle dressed up as Santa to surprise him and his siblings on Christmas Day. The oldest of the three was 6 back then, and the middle one 4 so they were all still pretty young and believed in Santa. As soon as he walked in however, the oldest of the three had a panic attack and could not handle the sight of his uncle dressed in red! He probably won’t admit it now as he is now in his late teens but I believe he is still petrified of anyone dressed in the Santa costume…”

The Thirsty Cat

“My cat is a bit of the king of the house and whenever we put the Christmas tree up he literally thinks that we put it there for him – to drink from. A bit like his personal water dish. One year however, as we were all sleeping, we heard the biggest noise coming from the living room. We all ran down in our PJs thinking we had been robbed, only to realise that he had literally knocked the tree down as he was quenching his thirst. Worst thing was – all the presents had already been placed underneath, and many had gotten ruined from the crash and water dammage!”

The Creepy Old Man

“I didn’t believe in Santa for that long because my siblings were much older than me and I always heard them whispering about the presents but when we were all younger I refused for Santa to come into my bedroom to fill the stockings at the end of the bed. Who would want a stranger come into their room? I guess I was a bit ahead of my time…”

The Glorious Birth

“This is more of a massive coincidence but my mother actually gave birth to my sister Mary (I swear the name was picked months before) at a Nativity play a few days before Christmas, in a theatre called “The Stables”. Weird, right?”

Did hearing all these stories inspire you to buy some gifts for the fam?

Featured images via Unsplash

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